Thursday, September 19, 2013

Happy 6 Months to my sweet Jack

I am starting to feel like a broken record. I cannot wrap my mind around how fast time flies. I thought I understood when I had your big brother Mark. I had no idea. These past 6 months have been the best of my life. Our family is (almost) complete. Six months ago I was probably nursing you to sleep and not wanting to put you down in your bassinet. I had you earlier in the afternoon and we had spent much of that time together. Mark came to meet you and was thoroughly confused. He went home with Grandma and Grandpa and it was just me, you and daddy in our cozy room. I was exhausted. I had been awake for 39 hours. I swear it must have been adrenaline (and pain) that kept me awake. By 9 pm, daddy and I could barely keep our eyes open. I had endured a difficult labor. But I would do it over a thousand times (well maybe not that many, but you get the idea), because your birth healed mommy. I had a goal and I did not lose sight of it, even when things got ugly. I never waivered in wanting a birth where I could walk over to your bassinet after you were born, and pick you up. Where I could be the one who changed your first diaper. Where I could remember those first hours when you looked at me like I was all that mattered. I will cherish those moments for the rest of my life, there is nothing like looking into your child's eyes for the first time. I can still close my eyes and go back to that moment when I delivered you and they placed you on my chest. I sobbed and held you close. Before I had your brother, I never thought it possible to love so deeply and without conditions. I was again reminded on March 19, 2013.

Now, when you are older and reading this as I hope you will one day, you will not be surprised to know that you were our surprise baby. I sometimes refer to you as a miracle because God must have known how much we needed you in our lives that he gave you to me at this time. Even though you were not expected, remember this: I have always wanted YOU. Although the timing was not part of my plan, I have wanted and waited for you all my life. I have always loved you. and I always will.

My labor was no indication of how our time would be with you. You have been the happiest, easiest baby I have ever met. Your brother was a good baby as well, and we referred to him as the happiest baby because he was truly always smiling. You are both one in the same. Two different personalities yet the two best babies I have ever known. You started sleeping through the night at 5.5 weeks old!! You have no idea how amazing that is. You will, though, one day.

You were almost 9 pounds at birth and you were packing on the pounds by the minute. But just like your brother, you are becoming more lean with the most kissable cheeks and thighs! I haven't given you any solids yet but they are coming soon!

You absolutely adore your older brother. He loves to make you laugh. My favorite moments are when the two of you are staring at each other, laughing. The beginning of your relationship was a little rough, Mark had a hard time adjusting to no longer being an only child. But that only lasted a few weeks and now, he loves you so much. He has to kiss you goodbye when he goes to his class at school. He is very concerned when he hears you cry after waking from a nap. I so look forward to watching your relationship grow.

These past  6 months have been full of changes for us, but I am so unbelievably thankful that one of those changes was you. You have filled my heart. You remind me to slow down and appreciate these tender years. You snuggle on me right when I need it. Thank you for that. I love you more than words can say and I am so grateful that on July 13, 2012, I was "surprised."